DEAR MARGO - When the Outside World Has Been Made "The Enemy"
My sisters also don't take very good care of themselves: not showering as often as needed, not using deodorant, not shaving their legs or underarms. I think that's because they aren't around anyone besides family, so they don't feel the need to bother. But I know they will be made fun of later and judged because of these things. They also show no real desire to ever discover the world, and I am worried they'll turn out like my older sister, who is in her 30s, lives at home and most likely will die a virgin. They're both bright, sweet girls, and I want them to have full lives and not waste their potential. What can I say to my mom so she'll realize she's not doing my sisters a favor by smothering and overprotecting them? -- Suppressed No Longer
Dear Sup: You are lucky, my dear, to have escaped. Considering how you turned out, your mother's "learning her lesson" with you doesn't hold water. She sounds selfish, if not disturbed, and I would start talking to your sisters about "the outside world." You also need to have a sit-down with your mom and tell her that what is going on is not healthy or normal. If you get nowhere, you might check into child protective services to see whether your mother could get some counseling/guidance/instruction about socializing your sisters. (Quite sad about the eldest.) Good luck. -- Margo, hermetically
Keeping it Vague
Dear Margo: I am a newlywed, married four months, and quite happy. We are both in our early 20s and plan to start a family in a couple of years. I've never met my husband's father because he abandoned their family long ago. After rekindling their relationship a few years ago (before we met), he overdrew my husband's bank account and took off again. He was not at our wedding, and I doubt he even knows we're married. Neither of us has any interest in including his father in our lives. (My parents live in the same town that we do, and we all get along fine.)
Recently, I asked my husband what he would tell our future children when they start asking about their grandfather. He simply shrugged and said, "Just that he's dead." I said I didn't think that was a good idea because if his father ever shows up, it would make us look like the bad guys. What would you do in this situation? -- Perplexed New Wife.
Dear Perp: I think saying that the other Grandpa went away a long time ago would do the trick. For little kids, that may imply being dead, but it will at least be accurate. I also have a hunch that any reappearance by this man who's proved he's not to be trusted will preclude any introductions to grandchildren. It sounds as if your husband has his number. -- Margo, preparedly
Dear Margo is written by Margo Howard, Ann Landers' daughter.
Photo: Margo Howard
Other Stories by This Author
Tags: icplaces, Margo Howard , Lifestyle























